Honoring Our Angels: A Reflection on the National Day of Remembrance for Pregnancy & Infant Loss

October 15, 2024 Posted by AJ Martofel

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Today, on October 15th, we pause to honor and remember all the precious lives lost far too soon. As many of you know, this day holds deep meaning for us personally. Last August, Sasha and I faced the unimaginable heartbreak of losing our baby girl, Zoey Lionela, at 35.5 weeks in utero. She brought so much love, magic, and joy to our lives, even though we never had the chance to meet her earthside.

As we continue to grieve her loss, we’ve found solace in knowing that we are not alone. So many in our Self-Care Is For Everyone community have shared similar stories of loss, and today, we stand with all of you. Whether it’s the loss of a pregnancy, infant, or child, we know that the grief is profound and lifelong. But together, we can honor their memories, even when our hearts still ache.

Why We Remember

The National Day of Remembrance for Pregnancy & Infant Loss serves as a reminder that the grief of losing a baby is real and valid. Whether your loss is recent or happened years ago, your pain is important, and your loved one will always be a part of you. On this day, we hope to offer support, compassion, and space to honor the lives that were taken too soon.

It’s also a reminder that while these loved ones may not be here physically, they live forever in our hearts and spirits. We believe that there are still meaningful ways to connect with them and celebrate their impact on our lives.

Ways to Memorialize and Honor Your Loved Ones

If you’ve experienced a loss like ours, here are some ideas on how to honor the memory of your loved one:

Light a Candle: The global Wave of Light encourages families to light a candle at 7 PM in their time zone, creating a continuous wave of light that moves across the world in honor of babies lost to pregnancy and infant loss. It’s a simple yet powerful way to join in solidarity with families everywhere.
Create a Memory Box: If you haven’t already, create a memory box filled with cherished items related to your little one—ultrasound pictures, notes, or keepsakes. These tangible reminders provide comfort and offer a space for you to reflect on the love you shared, even in the short time they were with you.
Plant a Tree or Flower in Their Honor: Just as love continues to grow even after loss, planting something in memory of your baby can be a beautiful symbol of life. Watching it bloom year after year can provide a sense of connection and ongoing remembrance.
Write Them a Letter: If you feel moved, writing a letter to your baby can help you process your feelings. It’s a personal way to speak the words you may not have been able to say. Whether you write about your hopes, dreams, or the love you still carry, it’s a way to continue the bond.
Wear or Display Something Meaningful: We’ve seen so many in our community create or wear jewelry or clothing to honor their loved ones. Sometimes having a visible reminder—a piece of jewelry, a special tattoo, or artwork in your home—can provide comfort and a sense of presence in daily life.

Joining Together in Remembrance

As we reflect on our personal journey, we want to offer a space for others to share their stories. Whether you've faced a similar loss or are supporting someone who has, know that you are welcome here. In our grief and vulnerability, we create a strong community. Please feel free to email or DM us, share your stories, or simply light a candle in remembrance.

We’ll continue to honor Zoey’s memory through everything we do at Self-Care Is For Everyone, and we are committed to holding space for those who, like us, are navigating the pain of loss. Your babies, your stories, and your love matter. We are forever grateful to walk this journey with you.